I feel like study rather than going National Service.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010 10:36 AM
Is my decision wrong ?
I just feel like going to study rather than going to National Service. But its too late for me to apply the course and i don't think i can continue to study , not because i don't wish to study .
Is because of my family problems. They can't afford the money to let me continue to study anymore so now i had to independent. Being poor are really hard to survive in this world. Everyday pass and i still can't decide what are my future are.
I always think why should my mum give birth to me in this world ? and let me suffers so much of pain and stress . So many incident happen to me . I really tired and i just feel like dieing too , but i manage to survive once and another , you will never know how hurt and pain inside my body now. God had been giving me 2 chances and yesterday i nearly bang by car again, don't know why suddenly walk into the road without realize .
And also i been seeing those things again , i don't know is a good things or bad things but i just don't wish to care. It's been so long i haven't seen those and i don't know why i don't scare of it either , think i really get use to it already.
nothing more to post, so tired and 22 days left for me to enjoy before NS :(
